I'd like to share a song by Missy Higgins, Nightminds:

Just lay it all down. Put your face into my neck and let it fall out.
I know I know I know.
I knew before you got home.

This world you're in now,
it doesn't have to be alone,
I'll get there somehow, 'cos
I know I know I know
when, even springtime feels cold.

But I will learn to breathe this ugliness you see,
so we can both be there and we can both share the dark.
And in our honesty, together we will rise,
out of our nightminds, and into the light
at the end of the fight...

You were blessed by a different kind of inner view: it's all magnified.
The highs would make you fly, and the lows make you want to die.
And I was once there, hanging from that very ledge where you are standing.
So I know I know I know,
it's easier to let go.

And in our honesty, together we will rise,
out of our nightminds, and into the light
at the end of the fight...

I could be lazy and let her words be my post. She voices my heart's lyrics so well. I appreciate the line "I know... when even springtime feels cold." Sitting in August weather, I desire winter. I want to be chilled to the bone and covered in down jackets so thick my heart will be shielded from vulnerability. I want to cover up, not expose. Exposing my heart hurts. Honesty, openness, pains me. I don't want to talk. I want to turn my AC down to 30 degrees, bundle up, and stay in bed, not caring what time it is. I've shared with a few people that it is against my will to open up and talk, and they have apologized for asking me to share my heart. Do. Not. Apologize. I don't want to talk, but I need to. I have to.

That's all.